I Am A King,

"I am a king, born from God's lineage, I am royalty..."
This 'poetry slam' reminded me that I had forgotten that I was better than who my exboyfriend thought I was or who I made myself seem. You see, no one is ever gonna see me for the full person that I am except my myself. My exboyfriend damn sure as heck didn't appreciate nor accept me, well, I don't really expect anyone to, but I also know there will be people that weren't as cruel as him so I keep it pushing. This slam just shows that, even when times are at the roughest & most bitter climaxes, there's always going to be integrity, perseverance, & will left in an individual to keep moving forward. Well you see, I am that individual. So he knocked me down once, twice, three times... but that's it. Last night was his last stand, no standing ovations. He exited the stage in between his 'IDKS' & assumptions. For me, I was blessed because the heartache is over & I'm looking forward to tomorrow because tomorrow's another day.
WORD.

One Love,

Still gathering my thoughts about this one,so keep posted for a deeper post (:

Mothers,

"You must mean in-correct as within the perimeters of being right..."
I saved this video & watched it again this morning. Beautifully put & so well said. But really, who can't say this about their mother? Most mothers are just the epitome of a blessing. God bless the mothers that are are also 'fathers'. For those women who were left 5 months pregnant, for those women who were left with 2 kids to feed & care for, for those women who never had someone to begin with & lived lives as single mothers period... God bless them all. This is for all the mothers that are 'fathers' & for mothers in general because without our mothers we would be nowhere. This is for the women whose wombs were made a home for 9 months, who gave birth to us, cared for us, & raised us to be whom we are today & who we will prosper to be tomorrow. I want to say thank you to my own mother for 18 years of 'tender love & care', for all the sweat & tears she shed for me, as well as money & hard work she put in to raise me & educate me. God bless you mothers. God bless my dear mother, I love you.
WORD.

Hands,

Here is something beautiful to end my night/morning & something for the rest of you to sleep on or to wakeup to. Enjoy the spoken words of Sarah Kay in her piece called 'Hands'.
WORD.

Executing What Never Was,

I feel like the executioner just decapitated my heart. He took it out my chest & put it on the block. But you see, it's okay that he broke my heart in two. The love it had ever felt seemed like a fairytale, a story straight from childhood like 'hickory, dickory dock, the mouse went up the clock'. The love it ever felt, only felt a few. Significantly, it was in it's last stand, last crusade anyways. There was no 'knight in shining armor' to come to it's aid. This is probably why my heart got sold to the executioner's blade. There never was what I thought there was to be & as much as I wanted to deny it before, now I see. It was all once so surreal to my naked eye. I took every word as the honest truth & honored ever bit of it spoken, but turns out my heart was always loving on a lie. This is why I was content that the executioner abolished my heart & it's leftover tokens. He abolished what never was & left it on the block broken.

WORD.

Painful Recollection,

She quietly crept out her window sill into the dark backyard. She tip-toed to the side door of her house not once looking back. So young, so naive, out that side door she walked & it was a rap. She waited on the corner for friends to attend to a party anticipated for weeks. Deep in her mind, 'What will momma say or what will daddy think? I cannot even bear to think of what they would say to me when they speak.' There's no going back now for she had already gone too far & waited too long, & here came the car with the heavy bass booming to a song with 2 guy friends she knew for only a few 3 to 4 months long. At the party they stepped in & had a good night, socialized & danced, ladies in their best outfits & fellas with drinks in their hands. This wasn't her scene, she was too young & too naive she didn't even know. She only felt like it was something out of a show. She liked it, this freedom of sneaking out. Deep in her mind, 'Damn, if they ever knew... momma would be disappointed in me & daddy would scream & shout.' She let her night go on til about the stroke of 2 in the morn, & it was then her & her friends left reminiscing about how much fun they had. As far as she knew, they were gonna take her home but she thought too soon. Blocks away from her house, friend number one stopped the car & it was looking pretty bad. But you see, she liked this dude & liked him enough to stay but nevertheless she didn't know her actions had consequences & she would have to pay. He climbed in the backseat with her as friend number two awaited outside. He talked this & that & pulling line after line. They got to kissing right, & it felt right... it felt right til friend number 2 climbed in the backseat too. Then it felt wrong, wrong, it felt so wrong to feel him & him beside her with her right in the middle. It felt even more wrong that these dudes tried to get inside of her, she questioned them 'Why?' like a riddle. She pleaded for them to take her home but they threatened her & told her 'NO' unless they got what they wanted. They wanted 'IT', they wanted sex, they wanted head, they wanted dome, whatever you want to call 'IT', they wanted 'IT' all before they could take her home. Deep in her mind, 'This was a mistake & I should've thought twice. Damn I am so young, so naive & all of this just ain't right. No means no & they ain't comprehending my statement at all. They can't even see the tears against my cheek, they fall, they fall.' She submitted to their desires & gave up her will to be able to go home. Yeah, she gave it up against her will, 'IT', the sex & the dome. They penetrated her youth with a dagger & she definitely paid for her irresponsibility. It hurt her so consistantly. An hour or two they used her & abused her. Friend number one pulled her hair even though she asked him to stop. Friend number two slapped her when he was on top. Friend number one bit her, choked her, & left her hickeys for days. Friend number one & two 'arrived' & left her dazed. An hour or two they left her bruised after all the misuse & abuse. Then, they dropped her off on the corner they picked her up at. They left her on the corner & right there she sat. She sat there & cried in the dark until she finally had the nerves to walk the rest of the way home. & As silently as she came out, she was just as silent as she walked back in. She walked back in to find her window closed & locked with no way back in. Deep in her mind, 'Shit, my parents already know & there's no way out of this one.' To the front door she made her debut to her parents with 3 knocks & some sobs. She just wanted to kill herself from the embarrassment, she asked herself, 'Where's a gun when you need one?' In the light, beat up she stood with a body bruised. Daddy was angry & hit her, momma hugged her as she cried & while she did so, she looked at her confused, like 'How could this happen to my babygirl?' Deep in her mind, 'Momma, this is a cruel cruel fucking world. Why it happend to me you ask? I messed up I know, but I will never admit it through this embarrassment in my fucked up show.' The house that night felt like lightning hit it twice, an earthquake shook it up, & each beating heart present froze as cold as ice. This night she cried herself to sleep with her head in her pillows & sheets over her head. In her dark room she wanted to stay forever & never leave her bed.

You see, to this day she recollects this painful memory in her head.

WORD.

Poetic Asylum,

"I would paint the White House 'clear' because if you ask me unity has no color...Dr. King had a dream, for him I would sleepwalk."
Potential for the human race after all? Beautiful, just beautiful. He definitely got deep on me with this one. Shit, an educated, eloquent speaking young man with a beautiful mind? Goodness, well sir, I applaud you for you speak truth & with all honesty, call me a fan & let me tell you, I am in love haha.
WORD.

The Male Ego,

Egos, we all have them. Our egos suspend us negatively or positively. Egos illuminate us, egos diminish us. Each of our egos stand for a meaning or withstand a meaning that is against it. An ego is a reflection of what other's think, like a young child who doesn't know who he is, but simply knows of what other's think of him. An ego plays a role in this child's life as well as our own. Egos protect us, egos reveal us. Egos can be selfish or selfless. An ego is a social need that has been had amongst all of us.
Question, 'Between a male & a female, who's ego is more complex? & Why?'
WORD.

Bittersweet,

Ah yes, one of my favorite songs from Kanye. I feel as if my relationships with people can feel 'bittersweet' sometimes. My dad, my boyfriend, friends, other family members... it happens. There are gonna be things & times in life that aren't gonna make you happy, but those are the same times that we share with people that makes us love them the most, & that's why shit's gonna be 'bittersweet'. This piece by Kanye just always made me thought how cruel & beautiful the world & relationships can be with just about anyone or anything sometimes. The good, the bad, & the ugly sure do make the world go around & around.
WORD.

Girl Next Door,

The girl next door never looked so beautiful. She wears her hair down with a carefree mindset with a golden tan glowing under the sun walking around her in own bare necessities. The girl next door never talked so eloquently. She speaks her mind ruthlessly even if it's outspoken, not giving a fuck who hears it as she speaks out loud because she speaks with significance. The girl next door never walked so gracefully. She walks by individuals looking them eye to eye, not being rude but being deep & keeping an open mind. The girl next door never looked so beautiful. Her eyes hold dimensions animated by her many dreams & ambitions. These same eyes captivate & surprise, these same eyes mourned joy & sadness, & these same eyes saw beautiful creations molded by her own words, feelings, & even emotions. The girl next door never talked so eloquently. She is always heard but mistaken, misread, & judged. Truthfully she speaks with some flaws but without weakness. The girl next door never walked so gracefully. She walks by minding her own business, hands in the pockets of her jeans as the eyes criss-cross her peripheral vision. She walks so gracefully to catch attention so modestly. The girl next door never was so perfect but so un-perfect it was beautiful, eloquent, & graceful. The girl next door never was so real, but so surreal, unbelievable to the eyes that behold her. This girl next door just so happens to be me, completely an individual of my own physical & mental abilities & gifts. This girl next door just so happens to be me, also incomplete in my growth & intelligence for I am still growing so bear with me. This girl next door is I, this girl is me.

I have found myself writing about my flaws once again. This is a beautiful recollection of how no one is perfect. Now, that is all I try to come across alongside the substantial evidence that I am unique. Any individual can be 'that girl/guy next door' with this same attitude or appearance, but expressed differently. It is a beautiful thing, our natural abilities to be one of a kind & put purpose into living so differently in our human race. This piece ends quite similarly to my other work in my 'about me'. It signifies my realization in appreciating myself for who I am. You may interpret this in any way you please but I am telling you how it is. Feel me? & Yes, I shall have a video of me reading this sooner or later so you can hear how it flows from my perspective. Enjoy.

WORD.

Drum,

Another beautiful piece by Shihan...
Shihan makes me realize how 'un-perfect' life can be sometimes but at the end of the day we have to be appreciative to the blessings that surround us. We are all flawed people with minds & lives so different from each other that it can sometimes be scary but we are all people, all the same in little ways & a part of this large human race. We need to look past the narrow alley ways & open our mind to more than just what is in front of us. This piece not only reminds me of life's 'flaws' but also of life's very own trials & tribulations. Each & everyone of us has them & it is inevitable to want to try to avoid them, every day & every night we come across them. Shihan, preach. Life is like a balancing act, indeed.
WORD.

You Move Me,

'You Move Me' by Gina Loring
I feel her on this one, because I know what it feels like for someone to make me feel this way... moved, loved, cared for. Yeah, I know what she means when she speaks about how she ain't perfect but yet she's still moved because he appreciates her for her imperfections. I feel her too deep, too deep I can't even grasp the depths. Yeah, I know what she means when memories bring her back to thinking about that one person she has one her mind. Down to the very climax, I know what she feels, I know what she means!
WORD.

Flashy Words,

"Flashy words make the world turn but, it don't turn rightSo I use these real eyes to realize the real lies being spoken but not heardCause we are more fascinated by that which is fabricated...There are 3 types of people in the world today,Those who play the game, those who watch the game,And those who didn't even know the game is being playedAn that's a beautifully painted picture And a picture worth a thousand wordsBut a picture that's worth a thousand words doesn't mean anythingIf them thousand words don't mean anythingOr if them thousand words mean that picture means nothing"
Words are said & heard all around us. Context is of the essence. Be careful of your usage for it can come back & haunt you. Be natural & be honest in whatever words you speak, because it is only you for whom your life can be reaped. & Shihan tells it like it is. There are so many lies that surround us so realize them with your real eyes these real lies. Be careful with what you listen to or hear. Words, are deep cutting, smoothly soothing. Words, oh words. Words could never hurt so much or be so adorned.
WORD.